Category Archives: cookies

On not snacking

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I shouldn’t do it. I shouldn’t even write about it. I shouldn’t watch cooking shows. I shouldn’t own cookbooks, go to grocery stores, check ads in the paper, watch commercials on television, or fantasize about the next cake or pie I’m going to bake. I have enough food at the two meals a day that I eat. (Breakfast is a mess for me because one, I’m not hungry in the morning, and two, eggs make me sick, so no breakfast.) My metabolism has slowed over the last decade and every snack that I eat goes to live on my waste. The sad truth is that when I get the munchies, I just have to endure otherwise I would be the size of the Goodyear blimp. Snacks are not, in and of themselves, evil, it is only snackers, those partaking of snacks who are evil or who have evil in their hearts. Whether it is pizza or cookies, cereal or chocolate cake, snacks are everywhere in our society, and at least three-quarters of the fast food industry is based on snacks–burgers, chicken, tacos, pasta, ribs, pizza–not a stand-up square meal. Fast food joints may offer salads and fruit, a fish sandwich, vegan dishes and the like, but people, most people, go for the snack food. What is so sinister about snacks is that they are, by their very nature, temptation unleashed. Juicy, salty, fatty, sweet, they appeal to our basest desires to sate our darkest desires even when we have no need–none whatsoever. We are, for the most part, a well-fed society. A good majority of us have more than enough food every day. The fact that our food supply is so overwhelmingly prevalent and accessible stands in dark contrast to how the rest of the world lives, or not. We overeat at every turn, and we still snack. Go to the movies and watch people buy their popcorn, candy, and soda just after they have had a meal. They probably just ate at home just before they came to the movie theater. At home, we stock the larder with all kinds of snacks–cookies, crackers, pretzels, pizza, nuggets, chocolate, cereal, pizza, ice cream, candy, and I haven’t even mentioned all the leftovers in the fridge upon which we might graze–hot dogs, hamburgers, meatballs, mashed potatoes, pork chops, steak, lasagna. Don’t get me wrong, I love to snack as much as the next guy, maybe more in fact. I love to stay up late and eat potato chips, really salty, really crunchy. Maybe the all-time best snack every, a little salty, sweet, crunchy, freshly made caramel corn. Not the stuff you buy in the store, but the stuff you pop yourself and mix with your own homemade caramel sauce. Temptation never had it so easy. I guess the problem with snacks is that it is food we just don’t need to eat, but we can’t either stop or help ourselves. Doughnuts, who needs a doughnut? A triple white mocha with whipped cream and sprinkles? Pound cake with frosting? Muffins. Did anyone ever need to eat a muffin, or it’s weird and creepy doppleganger, the frosted cupcake. As a society we are considering legislation to limit the sale of super-sized soft drinks of 64 or more ounces because obesity is such a problem in America. I imagine this begs the question: is our own success killing us because we cannot control, on a personal level, the amount of food that we eat?

On the munchies

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Everybody gets them, and always at the worst time. The munchies are rather irrational–eating when you don’t really need to. You had a big lunch or supper, but only a couple of hours have past and you already want a Twinky. You know that there is a fresh bag of chips in the cupboard, and you are planning your assault. The munchies show up at about midnight, maybe a little after. They also show up during sporting events, especially when you ensconced on your sofa drinking a refreshment. The munchies are an irrational craving that crawls into your brain like a Night Gallery earwig and gnaws at your cerebellum until you give in and make the popcorn, break open a new package of Ho-Ho’s, eat an entire row of Oreos, deep fry a few Twinkies, roll out a barrel of carmel corn, break out a box of chocolates, eat that Snickers that you hid away in the back of the freezer, go to White Castle for some sliders. Some people, skinny people mostly, can luxuriate in a profound attack of the munchies and suffer no ill effects from a night of gorging, but the rest of us feel nothing but bloat and guilt. Gluttony is a mortal sin, after all. But the munchies are amoral and know no bounds or ethical codes, are blind and unfeeling. The stomach growls, the saliva flows, and visions of sugar plums dance in your head. You start looking for your keys, the local gas station gas candy bars, peanuts, Cracker Jacks, and potato chips. Maybe some soda too. Some Little Debbie snack cakes. You stare into the dim light of the refrigerator wondering where the leftover meatloaf went and wondering what might happen if you resuscitate the macaroni and cheese that was left over last week and is starting to look furry. In disdain, you push aside a Diet Coke, and wonder if you can super-size an order of burgers at the local fast food chain, you know, the one with the clown. It’s three a.m. and the pit in your stomach is deep and empty, so you head out to Wally World for crackers, gum drops, Pop Tarts, Cheerios, milk, and a couple of caramel apples. The munchies are why the big box stores never close. They are filled with people trying to solve their munchies habit, walking up and down the aisles trying to find that one perfect snack that will resolve their craving. The munchies bring out the worst in all of us, eating when we don’t need it, ruining our diets, putting on some extra weight, wrecking our teeth, pushing our blood sugar to record levels. We dream of cheese cake, doughnuts, and cotton candy, but we should be eating a small salad with lettuce, tomato, and onion. Olives are part of the munchies family, so one must stay away from them. We have met the enemy, as Pogo once said, and he is us.

On the munchies

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Everybody gets them, and always at the worst time. The munchies are rather irrational–eating when you don’t really need to. You had a big lunch or supper, but only a couple of hours have past and you already want a Twinky. You know that there is a fresh bag of chips in the cupboard, and you are planning your assault. The munchies show up at about midnight, maybe a little after. They also show up during sporting events, especially when you ensconced on your sofa drinking a refreshment. The munchies are an irrational craving that crawls into your brain like a Night Gallery earwig and gnaws at your cerebellum until you give in and make the popcorn, break open a new package of Ho-Ho’s, eat an entire row of Oreos, deep fry a few Twinkies, roll out a barrel of carmel corn, break out a box of chocolates, eat that Snickers that you hid away in the back of the freezer, go to White Castle for some sliders. Some people, skinny people mostly, can luxuriate in a profound attack of the munchies and suffer no ill effects from a night of gorging, but the rest of us feel nothing but bloat and guilt. Gluttony is a mortal sin, after all. But the munchies are amoral and know no bounds or ethical codes, are blind and unfeeling. The stomach growls, the saliva flows, and visions of sugar plums dance in your head. You start looking for your keys, the local gas station gas candy bars, peanuts, Cracker Jacks, and potato chips. Maybe some soda too. Some Little Debbie snack cakes. You stare into the dim light of the refrigerator wondering where the leftover meatloaf went and wondering what might happen if you resuscitate the macaroni and cheese that was left over last week and is starting to look furry. In disdain, you push aside a Diet Coke, and wonder if you can super-size an order of burgers at the local fast food chain, you know, the one with the clown. It’s three a.m. and the pit in your stomach is deep and empty, so you head out to Wally World for crackers, gum drops, Pop Tarts, Cheerios, milk, and a couple of caramel apples. The munchies are why the big box stores never close. They are filled with people trying to solve their munchies habit, walking up and down the aisles trying to find that one perfect snack that will resolve their craving. The munchies bring out the worst in all of us, eating when we don’t need it, ruining our diets, putting on some extra weight, wrecking our teeth, pushing our blood sugar to record levels. We dream of cheese cake, doughnuts, and cotton candy, but we should be eating a small salad with lettuce, tomato, and onion. Olives are part of the munchies family, so one must stay away from them. We have met the enemy, as Pogo once said, and he is us.

On fat

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Do we all carry around a few extra pounds because we love to eat, don’t do as much exercise as we should, and watch too much television? We all eat too much fat, and since we don’t have to hunt down, kill, and slaughter our own food, we don’t exercise enough to burn up all the calories that we consume. Our own genetic makeup of hunter/gatherers now betrays us because of an overabundance of food, an overabundance of time, an overabundance of leisure, and an overabundance of opportunities for eating. So our sedentary lives are not the lives we were designed for, and we get fat. But it doesn’t all happen at once. First, your clothes don’t fit right. You’ve been eating a bit of barbecue, a super-size order of fries, a large shake, two hamburgers instead of one, a large soda with both sugar and caffeine, an extra snack before bed, an extra-helping of mashed potatoes and gravy, chocolate cake, cookies, extra whipped cream on your double-sugar café mocha, candy, and the rest of the food you eat you don’t even want to talk about. You know it’s bad for you, but you can’t help yourself, so you settle for buying bigger clothes, baggier shirts, and your waist-line continues to grow, and you have less and less energy, and you do less and less exercise. As you gain weight you are more willing to settle for more food and less activity. Yet we still buy more potato chips, more dessert cakes with cream filling, more sugary cookies, more prepared foods, and less fruit and vegetable, less protein, more sugar. The problem is simple: we are designed for lots of activity in combination with eating a lot because active eaters were assured of passing on their genes. Ten thousand years ago, those who did not eat all they could, died of hunger, and never passed on their genes. Now, those who have survived to spread their genes are still with us, but those same inclinations to eat as much as possible are now the same inclinations that will lead to obesity and death, diabetes, kidney failure and the like. Our bodies are meant to be lean and mean, and body mass index may be an indicator of continued good health and a long and happy life. But we keep the sugar producers in business by buying and eating food that is loaded with sugar. What could be more unhealthy than a meal at a local fast food chain that includes soda, fries and burgers. The protein in the burger is probably okay, but the rest you can chuck. Historically, sugar came into our diets when the colonies began to grow cane in the Indies. Up to that point, sugary foods were uncommon and prohibitively expensive, so over-weight people were uncommon, not rare, just uncommon. Going back to a simpler, more varied diet with a good dose of protein might be an answer as long as it is consumed in moderation. Perhaps moderation is the secret to most things in life. It goes without saying, though, that it is our lack of self-control and zero moderation which causes our collective waistlines to grow.

On fat

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Do we all carry around a few extra pounds because we love to eat, don’t do as much exercise as we should, and watch too much television? We all eat too much fat, and since we don’t have to hunt down, kill, and slaughter our own food, we don’t exercise enough to burn up all the calories that we consume. Our own genetic makeup of hunter/gatherers now betrays us because of an overabundance of food, an overabundance of time, an overabundance of leisure, and an overabundance of opportunities for eating. So our sedentary lives are not the lives we were designed for, and we get fat. But it doesn’t all happen at once. First, your clothes don’t fit right. You’ve been eating a bit of barbecue, a super-size order of fries, a large shake, two hamburgers instead of one, a large soda with both sugar and caffeine, an extra snack before bed, an extra-helping of mashed potatoes and gravy, chocolate cake, cookies, extra whipped cream on your double-sugar café mocha, candy, and the rest of the food you eat you don’t even want to talk about. You know it’s bad for you, but you can’t help yourself, so you settle for buying bigger clothes, baggier shirts, and your waist-line continues to grow, and you have less and less energy, and you do less and less exercise. As you gain weight you are more willing to settle for more food and less activity. Yet we still buy more potato chips, more dessert cakes with cream filling, more sugary cookies, more prepared foods, and less fruit and vegetable, less protein, more sugar. The problem is simple: we are designed for lots of activity in combination with eating a lot because active eaters were assured of passing on their genes. Ten thousand years ago, those who did not eat all they could, died of hunger, and never passed on their genes. Now, those who have survived to spread their genes are still with us, but those same inclinations to eat as much as possible are now the same inclinations that will lead to obesity and death, diabetes, kidney failure and the like. Our bodies are meant to be lean and mean, and body mass index may be an indicator of continued good health and a long and happy life. But we keep the sugar producers in business by buying and eating food that is loaded with sugar. What could be more unhealthy than a meal at a local fast food chain that includes soda, fries and burgers. The protein in the burger is probably okay, but the rest you can chuck. Historically, sugar came into our diets when the colonies began to grow cane in the Indies. Up to that point, sugary foods were uncommon and prohibitively expensive, so over-weight people were uncommon, not rare, just uncommon. Going back to a simpler, more varied diet with a good dose of protein might be an answer as long as it is consumed in moderation. Perhaps moderation is the secret to most things in life. It goes without saying, though, that it is our lack of self-control and zero moderation which causes our collective waistlines to grow.

On a midnight snack

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We just had dinner, but I am hungry again, and the clock says 12:15 am. I know I shouldn’t be eating a midnight snack, but I want something to crunch on while I drink something cold. It is blessed summer, of course, which is enough all by itself to make me grouchy. The heat takes away my appetite, but the night brings it on. Nothing will kill my appetite like a stretch of hot weather I can’t avoid. Eating in a hot dining room kills my urge to eat. Now, however, it’s dark outside. The sun has been gone for hours and the urban landscape of bricks and concrete are letting go of the midday heat. Now, I’m ravenous. Snacking after midnight, though, is more of an art than a science. No, I shouldn’t consume anything with caffeine in it, but something that makes you sleepy such as a turkey sandwich is a prime objective. Except I can’t stand turkey, so I will settle for something less invasive, such as milk and cookies. Potato chips and milk also go together very well in the waning hours of the early morning. Sometimes a little pizza and beer can make a great combination, but never overdo these two or you will never get to sleep. Chocolate has caffeine, so it’s out, but a meatloaf sandwich done just right with fresh onions and jalapeños is one of the seven wonders of the night world. Cruising the refrigerator for leftovers can be a very positive activity. A little leftover mashed potatoes and gravy is wonderful especially if there is a pork chop to go with it. Cold steak can be turned into a dream sandwich especially if you have a few vegetables to put on it. I find leftover salad to be a little disheartening, but maybe you are different. Stray cookies, random lemon bars, a piece of cherry pie, ice cream are all fair game when it comes to late night snacking. I especially like to find those little boxes of leftover food that someone has brought home from one of the local restaurants–Mexican, Chinese, Italian, you never know what goodies lie in wait after midnight. I have been known to eat a bowl of cereal or two to calm my hunger pangs or to just calm my nerves after a rocky day. Finding a stray piece of fried chicken can be a real score at one in the morning. I don’t like watermelon late at night, and I probably wouldn’t eat menudo at that time of day either. Midnight snacking is a solitary pursuit mostly because you don’t want others to know what you are up to with your nose in the fridge. Doughnuts, pastries of all kinds, candy, are not pretty, especially when you have to watch other people eat them. Yes, midnight snacking is a weakness, but who really cares? I suspect that most people have indulged themselves in a little midnight snacking, and they certainly would not be proud if others knew it. I admire those can avoid it, but I also suspect that they are lying. When I’ve had a good bout with insomnia (and lost, of course), I will get up and raid the refrigerator. It’s the only solution to lying in bad, awake, waiting to great the hot sun of a new day without ever closing your eyes. A catastrophe.

On a midnight snack

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We just had dinner, but I am hungry again, and the clock says 12:15 am. I know I shouldn’t be eating a midnight snack, but I want something to crunch on while I drink something cold. It is blessed summer, of course, which is enough all by itself to make me grouchy. The heat takes away my appetite, but the night brings it on. Nothing will kill my appetite like a stretch of hot weather I can’t avoid. Eating in a hot dining room kills my urge to eat. Now, however, it’s dark outside. The sun has been gone for hours and the urban landscape of bricks and concrete are letting go of the midday heat. Now, I’m ravenous. Snacking after midnight, though, is more of an art than a science. No, I shouldn’t consume anything with caffeine in it, but something that makes you sleepy such as a turkey sandwich is a prime objective. Except I can’t stand turkey, so I will settle for something less invasive, such as milk and cookies. Potato chips and milk also go together very well in the waning hours of the early morning. Sometimes a little pizza and beer can make a great combination, but never overdo these two or you will never get to sleep. Chocolate has caffeine, so it’s out, but a meatloaf sandwich done just right with fresh onions and jalapeños is one of the seven wonders of the night world. Cruising the refrigerator for leftovers can be a very positive activity. A little leftover mashed potatoes and gravy is wonderful especially if there is a pork chop to go with it. Cold steak can be turned into a dream sandwich especially if you have a few vegetables to put on it. I find leftover salad to be a little disheartening, but maybe you are different. Stray cookies, random lemon bars, a piece of cherry pie, ice cream are all fair game when it comes to late night snacking. I especially like to find those little boxes of leftover food that someone has brought home from one of the local restaurants–Mexican, Chinese, Italian, you never know what goodies lie in wait after midnight. I have been known to eat a bowl of cereal or two to calm my hunger pangs or to just calm my nerves after a rocky day. Finding a stray piece of fried chicken can be a real score at one in the morning. I don’t like watermelon late at night, and I probably wouldn’t eat menudo at that time of day either. Midnight snacking is a solitary pursuit mostly because you don’t want others to know what you are up to with your nose in the fridge. Doughnuts, pastries of all kinds, candy, are not pretty, especially when you have to watch other people eat them. Yes, midnight snacking is a weakness, but who really cares? I suspect that most people have indulged themselves in a little midnight snacking, and they certainly would not be proud if others knew it. I admire those can avoid it, but I also suspect that they are lying. When I’ve had a good bout with insomnia (and lost, of course), I will get up and raid the refrigerator. It’s the only solution to lying in bad, awake, waiting to great the hot sun of a new day without ever closing your eyes. A catastrophe.

On sugar

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Why we are drawn to sugar is not really a mystery. Sugar is a high source of energy, and will ensure the survival of the organism in the face of almost any disaster, flood, fire, blizzard, tornado or earthquake. Sugar enters the blood like a steamroller and energizes the body in a way that almost no other food does. So we love sugar, it’s crystalline sweetness is a Siren song that cannot be resisted. Those who have eaten sugar and sugary foods have flourished and have passed on their genes, and those that passed up the sugar have long since been eliminated from the gene pool. Nevertheless, we have access today to more sugar than we should ever consume or need, but the desire for sugar which our ancestors left with us, is an ongoing legacy that is now getting us into trouble. We still desire sugar but we no longer need sugar because our dietary needs are much different than they were 100,000 years ago. We have become a nation of fatties because we cannot resist the sugar. Foods that no one should eat under almost any circumstance: soda pop, candy (including chocolate), breakfast cereal, ice cream, french fries, caramel corn. Even if we eat just a little bit of these things, we always sin by overeating, which is probably the real reason we are getting fat. Forget the sugar, we simply have too much food. No one should eat fast food, but fast food is everywhere, and most fast food has way too much sugar in it, the portions are growing annually, and we are more and more unhealthy. Yet, we make sugary desserts–pies, cakes, cookies, puddings, and we avoid healthier alternatives such as fruit, which has some sugar, but not quite as much as those other things. Eating less in general is a good thing. Eliminating sugar almost entirely is an ideal that can only be realized with an organized effort on the part of any given person. The sugar craving legacy of our ancestors is not only impossible to fight, it’s a fight that is killing us. Perhaps those who will live to pass on their genes to future generations will be those who do not crave sugar? Snack time!

On sugar

Posted on by

Why we are drawn to sugar is not really a mystery. Sugar is a high source of energy, and will ensure the survival of the organism in the face of almost any disaster, flood, fire, blizzard, tornado or earthquake. Sugar enters the blood like a steamroller and energizes the body in a way that almost no other food does. So we love sugar, it’s crystalline sweetness is a Siren song that cannot be resisted. Those who have eaten sugar and sugary foods have flourished and have passed on their genes, and those that passed up the sugar have long since been eliminated from the gene pool. Nevertheless, we have access today to more sugar than we should ever consume or need, but the desire for sugar which our ancestors left with us, is an ongoing legacy that is now getting us into trouble. We still desire sugar but we no longer need sugar because our dietary needs are much different than they were 100,000 years ago. We have become a nation of fatties because we cannot resist the sugar. Foods that no one should eat under almost any circumstance: soda pop, candy (including chocolate), breakfast cereal, ice cream, french fries, caramel corn. Even if we eat just a little bit of these things, we always sin by overeating, which is probably the real reason we are getting fat. Forget the sugar, we simply have too much food. No one should eat fast food, but fast food is everywhere, and most fast food has way too much sugar in it, the portions are growing annually, and we are more and more unhealthy. Yet, we make sugary desserts–pies, cakes, cookies, puddings, and we avoid healthier alternatives such as fruit, which has some sugar, but not quite as much as those other things. Eating less in general is a good thing. Eliminating sugar almost entirely is an ideal that can only be realized with an organized effort on the part of any given person. The sugar craving legacy of our ancestors is not only impossible to fight, it’s a fight that is killing us. Perhaps those who will live to pass on their genes to future generations will be those who do not crave sugar? Snack time!