Category: change
ThanksGIVE or ThanksGET?
Did you take a moment to think about what you’re thankful for this past week? At our Thanksgiving meal we have a family tradition of taking a moment to go around the table and reflect, lighting the candle of the person next to you and sharing something for which you’re thankful. Are the candles necessary? No, we have electricity. I think the candles are a visible symbol of many ideas, but maybe most importantly they are a reflection of intentionality. It takes time to light candles and not catch your neighboring family member on fire. It helps slow us down, helps us take the time to stop and reflect. If you stopped to think about giving thanks, what did you lift up? Personally, I wrestled with not wanting to say the same thing that everyone else wanted to say (even though I am very much thankful for all those things too). I didn’t want to go on with a long list, even though certainly is a long list of things for which to be thankful. There are lots of things that I probably wouldn’t even remember to be thankful for or list because the bounty that surrounds us is so plentiful. During this family ritual, our eleven year old, Carter, said he was thankful that we were able to help people that morning – taking Thanksgiving meals to less fortunate people in the community. It struck me that most of what we’re thankful for is a benefit or blessing for us. Thankful for what WE have. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that and I think we SHOULD stop and give thanks for the many blessings we have. [Insert levity here:] Carter’s reflection was followed by younger brother Max’s contribution: “I’m thankful for mySELF”! When I heard Carter’s response, my immediate reaction was “what a thoughtful and considerate young man!” and then I didn’t think about it anymore that day. But his focus on being thankful for how we can help others returned to me last night as I waited in line at the grocery store.
There were only two people in front of me and I was elated to be so fortunate. I don’t usually have much patience waiting in line at the store. Just when I thought this was about to be my favorite (and shortest) trip ever, the woman at the front of the line attempting to pay, ran into trouble. I noticed she was using a Lone Star Card (food stamp program) and it wasn’t working. While trying not to get frustrated with her child who was getting impatient, she attempted to call someone on the phone to solve the problem. At this point, I remember thinking, “seriously, you’re calling someone?” My speedy trip through the line just ground to a halt. The person she was calling didn’t answer and she seemed panicked about what to do. She did, however, seem concerned that she was holding up the line. For that, I gave thanks. I decided that really, I wasn’t late for an important meeting or anything, so it wouldn’t hurt me to calm down and make sure I wasn’t sending any signals of being irritated or inconvenienced. The woman asked the cashier if there was anyway she could move her loaded grocery cart to the side and let the people behind go ahead while she waited for her lifeline to return her call. After all my groceries were loaded and paid for, I could tell she wasn’t any closer to a resolution and Carter’s message rang through my head again — be thankful for how you can help others. I asked the cashier how much the woman owed and if I could pay for it. He looked at me like I was crazy. I was nervous about how much the bill might be. I certainly don’t mind giving an amount that won’t inconvenience me, but if the price tag were above that, would I be able to say, “Oh, then nevermind!” without looking like a jerk? The amount was not inconsequential, but it was less than my own groceries, so I swallowed hard and handed over again my credit card. As I prepared to leave, the woman with two kids and a cart full of groceries kept trying to call someone to help with her situation. I wheeled my groceries by, handed her the receipt, and said, “Merry Christmas, you’re good to go.” I smiled and quickly went on my way, not wanting to seem like I was waiting for her to shower me with thank yous.
One of the things I didn’t say at our Thanksgiving meal was that I was thankful to have enough money to put food on the table. I never even stopped to consider it. I was too busy thinking about things more fortunate people have to be thankful for. It always bothers me when people say things like “we are so fortunate” – It feels greedy to me, but it’s true. Maybe it feels uncomfortable because it seems to demand that we take action in light of the acknowledgement. If we are so fortunate, perhaps we have an obligation to use that fortune, to share those blessings. Are we thankful for what we have (that makes our lives easier, more comfortable, more convenient, more cushy) or are we thankful for the opportunities to help other people?
If you’ve made it this far, do me a favor. I’d love it if instead of commenting on this post, instead of giving me kudos for being such a benevolent person, you do these three things. Take a moment to reflect on opportunities to give. Then give thanks for those opportunities. Then act.
on changing your mind
“Those who can’t change their minds can’t change anything.”
-George Bernard Shaw (Irish playwright and a co-founder of the London School of Economics)
(Untitled)
this morning’s run
HEre’s a view of my morning run along the canal in downtown Indy. Beautiful running weather (at 37 degrees!) but no rain like yesterday morning. Lots of great art and architecture along this path that you can see on this google map of the run:
making a difference
Today I received an email from a student that caused me to stop and reflect. Well, to be fair, I read it and quickly shot off an email response and didn’t give it much thought. But then it occurred to me that there’s plenty to reflect on here. First, I’m not at work today (well not the usual sense of work)- I’m in another state, at a library conference. So kudos to me for my timely response to a “reference question”, right? [insert glowing compliments here].
But more importantly, the question tells a story. The question came from a music grad student at Baylor with whom I’d worked in the past. Each Fall, for more than a decade, I’ve been fortunate to be a part of the School of Music’s graduate research methods course, working alongside wonderful colleagues from the SOM who see the value of libraries and librarians and who are willing to share the stage with me to help guide their students through the morass of electronic tools and resources that can help them navigate through the metaphoric sea of information. More on that later.
Here’s the email I received (name withheld to protect the innocent) and below it, my reflections.
From: IDENTITY REMOVED@baylor.edu>
Date: April 11, 2013, 2:55:54 PM EDT
To: “Towers, Sha”
Subject: Google Reader is closing!Hey Sha,
You got me hooked on Google’s RSS in Research Methods last semester and now they’re closing it! I’m heart-broken! It’s so sad. What am I supposed to use now? What would you recommend?Anyway, I hope you’re having a great day!
As I thought more about this email, there were several things that stood out to me.
BTW, I told her to check out Feedly.com – where I just finished moving my own google reader universe.
So you if you’re still reading and you happen to remember (or glance back up at the title of this blogpost), you’re probably thinking I’m patting myself on the back for “making a difference” in the life of this student. But that’s only part of the story. The other part is that this email, this experience of helping people, this “being a librarian” is rewarding…fulfilling…meaningful. This email made me stop and realize that this work, this job, this vocation, makes a difference to me.
on running
Ran across a phrase this weekend that spoke to me and that summed up nicely what running has meant for me lately. It was in an editorial by David Willey, Editor-in-Chief of Runner’s World magazine:
” . . . [I] felt my senses shift from desk-bound and stressed out to alert and alive.”
Management v. Leadership
“Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.” -Peter Drucker
http://www.fastcompany.com/1838481/6-leadership-styles-and-when-you-should-use-them
Happiness
“We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”
Frederick Keonig
The Most Beautiful Place in the World
Ann asked me to check a book out from the library to read to her class and she shared with me this beautiful ending to the book:
I started to wonder if San Pablo really was the most beautiful place in the world. I wasn’t sure my grandmother had ever been anyplace else, but I still thought she’d know.
“Grandma,” I said, is it?”
“Is what?” she said.
“Is San Pablo the most beautiful place in the world?”
My grandmother made a little face.
“The most beautiful place in the world,” she said, “is anyplace.”
“Anyplace?” I repeated.
“Anyplace you can hold your head up. Anyplace you can be proud of who you are.”
“Yes,” I said.
But I thought, where you love somebody a whole lot, and you know that person loves you, that’s the most beautiful place in the world.
The Most Beautiful Place in the World, by Ann Cameron