On translating

Translating by definition is falsification and, ultimately, betrayal. Languages are not parallel so all translation is marked by what is lost, not by what is gained. All translators know this because it is their job to understand, interpret, and compromise as they switch a text or discourse from one language to another. There is no such thing as a literal translation, and all bilingual people understand this chasm between languages that cannot be bridged by translating. Translation is about changing a text is such a way that it might be understandable to people who don’t speak the original language. All translation is about loss. As I look at an English translation of Dante’s Inferno, I can only lament the loss of rhythm, sound, and rhyme. We get the “gist” of what Dante is saying about sin and shame, ego and pride, but his art as a poet is lost forever: Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita / mi ritrovai per una selva oscura, / ché la diritta via era smarrita. Translating and translation are about the translator turning a blind eye to the myriad and multiple meanings that cling to the original words and sacrificing the author’s creativity and originality so that the text might be accessible to others who fall outside the circle of the author’s language. Yet, translators prevail, get hired, and they do their jobs with little shame or humility. Translations are as ubiquitous as taxes and death. Could it be, all along, that translation is the world’s oldest profession? The problem, of course, is not translation, but the multiple languages the people of the world speak, that Tower of Babel from which we are doomed to inhabit forever. Yet, I am not in favor of making one language a required, dogmatic official language. The more common norm is for people to live in multilingual societies. Even today there are many areas of the world where people speak two, three, or even four languages according to the demands of the social situation. Being multilingual does not solve the problem of translation but it does eliminate the need for translation. If a person speaks Italian, reads Italian, then anything they experience in that language is self-explanatory even if the person’s first language might be German or French. Translation only occurs if the original language is a barrier to understanding the text, or conversation, or song. The only way to approach translation is to assume failure before you even start, and by assuming failure, the translator can only produce a new text which was inspired by the original. In a sense all texts are failed translations of other texts, and there exists no ur-text or Q manuscript which might have been original. Misreading, misunderstandings, ambiguity, mistakes, lacunae, accidents, double-entendre, obscurity, complexity, prejudice, bias, and misinterpretation all plague the translator who cannot avoid or evade his/her own human condition as imperfect translator. In the end, all translators must recognize their failure, ignore the imperfection of their work, and move forward to the next sentence with the understanding that failure is the best they can do. In a larger sense, this is the existential question of the human condition–translator as failure.

On translating

Translating by definition is falsification and, ultimately, betrayal. Languages are not parallel so all translation is marked by what is lost, not by what is gained. All translators know this because it is their job to understand, interpret, and compromise as they switch a text or discourse from one language to another. There is no such thing as a literal translation, and all bilingual people understand this chasm between languages that cannot be bridged by translating. Translation is about changing a text is such a way that it might be understandable to people who don’t speak the original language. All translation is about loss. As I look at an English translation of Dante’s Inferno, I can only lament the loss of rhythm, sound, and rhyme. We get the “gist” of what Dante is saying about sin and shame, ego and pride, but his art as a poet is lost forever: Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita / mi ritrovai per una selva oscura, / ché la diritta via era smarrita. Translating and translation are about the translator turning a blind eye to the myriad and multiple meanings that cling to the original words and sacrificing the author’s creativity and originality so that the text might be accessible to others who fall outside the circle of the author’s language. Yet, translators prevail, get hired, and they do their jobs with little shame or humility. Translations are as ubiquitous as taxes and death. Could it be, all along, that translation is the world’s oldest profession? The problem, of course, is not translation, but the multiple languages the people of the world speak, that Tower of Babel from which we are doomed to inhabit forever. Yet, I am not in favor of making one language a required, dogmatic official language. The more common norm is for people to live in multilingual societies. Even today there are many areas of the world where people speak two, three, or even four languages according to the demands of the social situation. Being multilingual does not solve the problem of translation but it does eliminate the need for translation. If a person speaks Italian, reads Italian, then anything they experience in that language is self-explanatory even if the person’s first language might be German or French. Translation only occurs if the original language is a barrier to understanding the text, or conversation, or song. The only way to approach translation is to assume failure before you even start, and by assuming failure, the translator can only produce a new text which was inspired by the original. In a sense all texts are failed translations of other texts, and there exists no ur-text or Q manuscript which might have been original. Misreading, misunderstandings, ambiguity, mistakes, lacunae, accidents, double-entendre, obscurity, complexity, prejudice, bias, and misinterpretation all plague the translator who cannot avoid or evade his/her own human condition as imperfect translator. In the end, all translators must recognize their failure, ignore the imperfection of their work, and move forward to the next sentence with the understanding that failure is the best they can do. In a larger sense, this is the existential question of the human condition–translator as failure.

On duct tape

It’s rather gray and silvery looking, very sticky on one side, shiny on the other. I first came across this miracle tape when I was a child and needed to fix the handle on a bat, a wooden bat that had cracked. Someone handed me a roll of the stuff and said, “Try this.” Since the bat I have fixed a hockey stick, six suitcases, a car window, a lawn mower, a wallet, three umbrellas, a baby carriage, a frying pan, a row boat, two screen doors, a water bucket, a backpack, various pairs of eyeglasses, the fruit drawer in the fridge, a bird house, numerous boxes, four tennis rackets, a water pipe, a tent, a tricycle, a rain poncho, books, a car seat, a lunch box. I wrapped Christmas presents one year with duct tape. I have searched Madrid for duct tape in order to fix a mangled suitcase. This tape was ideal for reinforcing the blade of a hockey stick, but it didn’t work so well to tape the shoes onto the feet of a cross country runner. Duct tape doesn’t work to fix any broken ceramics. It will keep mosquitos out if you are patching, temporarily, a torn screen or broken window. Some people have a knack for tearing off a piece of duct tape without letting it stick to itself–this is magic. Duct tape and heat and water do not mix, especially if any stress is involved. Car repairs (taping up a broken bumper, for example) usually go pretty well with duct tape, but they don’t last, especially if high speeds are involved. Rule: the duct tape will always be on the other end of the house if you need it. Corollary: the amount of tape you need for the repair is inversely proportional to the amount left on the roll. Axiom: if you are dire straights to make a repair, you will be out of duct tape because you loaned it to your neighbor who never returned it. Duct tape may be used to repair dental work, but the stickum tastes funny. Tapes that are not silver gray are not real duct tapes, but posers and imposters. Fixing either the toaster or the microwave with duct tape is not recommended. Duct taping one person to another may be interesting but it is also illegal in most counties in Texas. In a pinch, you may use duct tape to close a wound, but you should go to an emergency room just in case. Using duct tape to restrain an over-anxious pet is a bad idea for lots of reasons. Using duct tape to pick up spilled cereal is effective, but weird. Duct tape can be used to make name tags if you run out of those funny white squares in the plastic badges. If you use duct tape as an eye mask, you may end up both arrested and without eyebrows. Do not try to do anything with personal hygiene and duct tape, and hair removal, a harrowing experience at best, should not be done with duct tape. The tensil strength of duct tape is not as great as you think it is, so do not use it to tow anything. Automotive repairs, espeically anything that has to do with fuel, should not be attempted with duct tape unless blowing up is an option. I have never repaired a duct with duct tape.

On duct tape

It’s rather gray and silvery looking, very sticky on one side, shiny on the other. I first came across this miracle tape when I was a child and needed to fix the handle on a bat, a wooden bat that had cracked. Someone handed me a roll of the stuff and said, “Try this.” Since the bat I have fixed a hockey stick, six suitcases, a car window, a lawn mower, a wallet, three umbrellas, a baby carriage, a frying pan, a row boat, two screen doors, a water bucket, a backpack, various pairs of eyeglasses, the fruit drawer in the fridge, a bird house, numerous boxes, four tennis rackets, a water pipe, a tent, a tricycle, a rain poncho, books, a car seat, a lunch box. I wrapped Christmas presents one year with duct tape. I have searched Madrid for duct tape in order to fix a mangled suitcase. This tape was ideal for reinforcing the blade of a hockey stick, but it didn’t work so well to tape the shoes onto the feet of a cross country runner. Duct tape doesn’t work to fix any broken ceramics. It will keep mosquitos out if you are patching, temporarily, a torn screen or broken window. Some people have a knack for tearing off a piece of duct tape without letting it stick to itself–this is magic. Duct tape and heat and water do not mix, especially if any stress is involved. Car repairs (taping up a broken bumper, for example) usually go pretty well with duct tape, but they don’t last, especially if high speeds are involved. Rule: the duct tape will always be on the other end of the house if you need it. Corollary: the amount of tape you need for the repair is inversely proportional to the amount left on the roll. Axiom: if you are dire straights to make a repair, you will be out of duct tape because you loaned it to your neighbor who never returned it. Duct tape may be used to repair dental work, but the stickum tastes funny. Tapes that are not silver gray are not real duct tapes, but posers and imposters. Fixing either the toaster or the microwave with duct tape is not recommended. Duct taping one person to another may be interesting but it is also illegal in most counties in Texas. In a pinch, you may use duct tape to close a wound, but you should go to an emergency room just in case. Using duct tape to restrain an over-anxious pet is a bad idea for lots of reasons. Using duct tape to pick up spilled cereal is effective, but weird. Duct tape can be used to make name tags if you run out of those funny white squares in the plastic badges. If you use duct tape as an eye mask, you may end up both arrested and without eyebrows. Do not try to do anything with personal hygiene and duct tape, and hair removal, a harrowing experience at best, should not be done with duct tape. The tensil strength of duct tape is not as great as you think it is, so do not use it to tow anything. Automotive repairs, espeically anything that has to do with fuel, should not be attempted with duct tape unless blowing up is an option. I have never repaired a duct with duct tape.