From my Strengths Quest, I found that my top five strengths are individualization, achiever, connectedness, developer, and strategic. I feel that my results are a very accurate representation of myself although I have never really thought about it. I had several “ah-ha moments” when reading for summary of my strengths and identified with each one. I may have chuckled once or twice because these are things I do everyday without realizing it—a strengths test was telling me small things about me that I never even noticed until they brought it to my attention. All my strengths have played an active role in who I am even though I didn’t label for them. My leadership opportunity/venue has been the role that I have in my family. These strengths are a large tell-all about my relationships with my friends as well and how I interact with people as a leader. Below I have given some explanations and insights to my top 5 strengths and how they shaped my leadership role when interacting with my family.
Individualization:
- I can see everyone’s potential and I focus on the differences and strengths of each individual person.
- I love to people-watch and learn about each person I meet and learn what makes them them. I notice strengths and comfort zones of each person and this helps me to understand them more—this way I can work with them more easily. I recognize what each person does well and loves to do and I enjoy encouraging them and learning more about them. I always realize that each person is different and that is what I love! Everyone is a “special snowflake.”
- Observing people is what I do naturally. For many years, I had to deal with my family and the domestic violence and drug and alcohol abuse that went back 5 generations. Growing up and observing my family—I saw there strengths and their weaknesses. Understanding who they are and why they do what they do helped me to stay sane, confident in myself, and wanting to be healthy. I had to be a leader in my own family and set a new standard of health and love. I saw what made them them—and realized I couldn’t change them or be with them.
- Individualization makes me see how to work with most people and see where they are strong or weak, but it also allows me to see red flags and when you cannot work with someone at all unfortunately.
Achiever:
- This is highly evident in both my accomplishments and me everyday.
- I am a trier and a doer.
- Each day, I make lists and goals of what I need to get done or at least attempt to do. I always have goals and accomplishments and it gives me great satisfaction.
- I always try my hardest in school and earned straight A’s throughout high school. I love the feeling of getting good grades after studying tirelessly—it’s the ultimate payoff for working so hard and a great affirmation for all my effort.
- I achieve both emotionally and socially as well as I overcame the dysfunction that my family set before me. I wanted to have more hope, happiness, and a better life than the generations before me so I set higher standards. I see achieving as taking care of myself and improving—it makes me feel my best when I try my best.
- I wanted to be better than the domestic violence, alcoholism, and drug abuse that had overtaken my family. My hope in being an achiever in all areas of my life is that I set an example for others of what Christ can do in a person’s life.
Connectedness:
- I believe that everything happens for a reason and we all connected through Christ—we are all part of the body of Christ and we are all his children.
- As brothers and sisters in Christ, we have a responsibility to take care of each other and ourselves as such. I value and care for each person because they have value in Christ and are made in his image.
- My values rest on this view that we are God’s and in a way each other’s. I try to treat others the way Christ would treat them and the way I would want to be treated.
- My faith and convictions build who I am and are steadfast. They get me through hard times, like my family, and the best times, like entering into college and reaching my dreams.
- In a leadership role, this strength allows be to be caring and accepting for all members of the group. Also, it keeps me honest and kind because I do not want to exploit God’s creation or sin against God or his creation.
Developer:
- I see potential in everyone—everyone has potential and success within them!
- I challenge people to do there best as I love to encourage people—affirmation notes, verbally, hugs, texts, in passing.
- Seeing others grow in any way is what I love to see—I always have hope that people will do their best, reach their fullest potential in Christ, and take care of themselves.
- Within my family, I see so much talent, both tapped and untapped. Because of all the dysfunction, much of their potential is buried very deep. Even though my family is unhealthy, I still love them and miss them. My relationship with my dad is an active example of this strength. Emails are our means of communication because he is an unsafe individual so emails are my chance to minister to him. I encourage him to get help from a professional counselor and doctor and take care of himself because he has the potential to be a great man, but chooses not to. There is still hope inside of me that he will reach his full potential someday. I know I cannot change him—but I still challenge him and his choices in the love of Christ.
Strategic:
- I try to always pick the most direct and wisest choice for myself so that I can achieve my goals.
- Had to maneuver a lot of dysfunctional situation I was in and get out of it while still being safe and being me
- I chose the path that was best for me and would help me achieve my goals and keep me healthy and safe.
- Went to counseling for myself
- Went to school and got good grades
- Left my family home and the dysfunction
- Lived with my mom in a guest house starting in 7th grade (safe and healthy home and choices
- Found a safe community within my school and friend group
- Made good friends
- Decided to be a first generation student and go to college
Through my experiences and the development of my strengths, I most heartily agree that leadership is a “process” (Northouse). I didn’t want to do it at first. I never intended that for myself to develop such a care or understanding for others, but God planned otherwise. Through my circumstance, I have grown to be a leader. As a kid, I was outgoing, but my family breaking up was truly a heartbreak and I felt defeated. Learning to grow in Christ and nurturing myself, these strengths developed. I had to take care of me and get up and move forward. I couldn’t and wouldn’t let my circumstance keep me down—I don’t think I realized the gravity of what I was doing because I made the choice to be healthy and leave my family home when I was only 8. It was an “easy” and sober decision for me. I have had to continue grow into myself again and heal and grow into being a leader. I am an advocate for “emotional intelligence” (Northouse 28) and have found this concept to be very true in being a leader and just in life in general. Without the “abilities to perceive, facilitate, understand, and manage emotion,” I couldn’t have made it through my family circumstance—I wouldn’t have been able to cope or communicate with anyone without being aware of how I felt and comprehending it all. A large part of my life has been developing “social competence” which “consists of empathy and social skills such as communication and conflict management.” Throughout my experiences and now this strengths quest, emotional and social connections and development seem to definitely be my strong suite.